Living

Yep, just as the title says, living life as it comes. Im taking the good times with the bad times and making whatever I can out of it. As for family, they are hanging in there, I worry about everyone and try to be the strong one, sometimes it works...sometimes it doesn't but hey, what are you going to do? As for melissa, it makes me day better, everytime I talk to her, sometimes I think I'm pushing my feelings to strongly on her, and I have to remember, as I said, everything takes time. The point is that, I am happy at where I am, and at we are right now. As for her feelings, I am not to clearly, her barrier is always up, which in ways is a good thing. She makes me happy, and I have a feeling I do the same for her :-p. I guess I worry about my feelings because, just like her I've been hurt in the past and don't want to fall to fast, even though my heart is in it...Thats about it for today's adventures...might wanna call it a night, but everyone have a goodnight, and God bless..

-Paul C.

Back to Earth

I look back at all these blogs, and even though its only been 2 years, it seems like a life time ago in my mind...So much as changed since those times. Ive stopped going to college (going back though, made some mistakes) met hundreds of people...and been living life as best or as worse as it comes. Speaking of which, ive met..well not met, started getting to know a friend of mine after such a long time of not talking. Her name is melissa, and shes just really...i don't know how to explain it...just great! I mean her optimiusm is something that I haven't seen in such a long time! Even when she's talking about something depressing...her voice always keeps me afloat...she like I have been very hurt in the past, and I can feel (even through the computer) her barriers that she has up, and I am in no rush to break them down, but to get to know her as a person and as melissa..because she is just that important to me...I just keep wondering how she feels about everything, but I know when she feels the time is right she'll tell me :-p, but yes, she is amazing and thats a fact of life...not just my opinion, I can't wait til I go down there in april (or earlier) to see her, and just be in her presence..:)...Anything else in life...ive just been down lately, because of the drama people start up for fun..

I honestly don't think its fair at all, but I guess thats just how some people are now a days, and I will have to live with it. But important people in my life like melissa keep my afloat even when I feel like im drowning in sorrow..:) Well I think that was alot to deal with all in one day, don't you? lol. But rest assure ill be back to tell you more stories of my amazing and interesting life :-p take care.

-Paul Campbell.

Subject - Fly Through The Days...

As the subject says, things have happened over the past week, got mad, blah, blah, blah...and stopped talking to Miranda forever. Going to Applebees tomorrow to talk to the GM (General Manager) about taking some leave time, to work hard in school, so that maybe I can get that 4.0. I am really over the sadness phase...(almost there), I of course haven't forgotten about everything, just put it behind me, because school and work is more important.

I am taking everything just like I always have, day by day, and letting life take it's course while I work my way through it. I am at work right now, with hardly anything to do for the moment and just wasting my time typing to you wonderful people out there who are dieing to hear my problems. :) Well that's about it for now, but I will talk to you guys later, either here or on myspace :)

-Paul C.

Subject - Shattered...

Well the subject speaks for itself, Miranda and I are no more. It looks like she is going to wait for her ex boyfriend, so what maybe they get together. I think that is a good thing I suppose, I am past the pissed stage, just at the regret stage that this went on for this long, it's funny I really thought I was in love and everything was cool. I set myself up for the fall, it wasn't "really" her fault..

I talked about her to friends and such, like we were really in a great relationship, but in the back of my mind I thought that she still loved her ex boyfriend, but I ignored it. I was sooo in love with her, thinking that NOTHING could even touch me..oh boy what a fool I was. We broke up tonight and it hit me like a ton of bricks. I am recoving quietly for now, tomorrow's classes will be like hell....

I am off to read some of books for class and have a uneasy night's sleep.

Currently Playing Atl Project By Atl see related

- Let Me Make it Up With Love

Subject - Dustin off the Xanga...Events galore.

Hey yall...shit I am so lazy right now, but anyway. So many things have happened since I updated. School is going good, the moving is going good enough, and I will be out of Mt. Holly soon enough, but I will still be in driving distance of everyone and everything, so I suppose it isn't all that bad. Oh yeah I am not longer single, I have a girlfriend now (Miranda), it feels a little more natural to be with someone. I am not going into that whole, my life is complete shit...But it just feels like I am alot more relaxed when I am in a relationship, I don't think as much *Trust me I think every second of the day*. I just came back from my friends house, I spent some hours there, and Miranda was there, it felt strange though, don't get me wrong it was cool and everything. But I wasn't used to being as relaxed as I usually am, with her being there with me.

I may be thinking too much into this, but I felt like even with her hittin me, I was at peace, and ya know what I like that feeling. But ya know, I may just be thinking too hard, who knows :)

- Paul